When one of our clients pass away, we will get a phone call from one of the kids. It is such a hard time for me personally. My clients aren’t account numbers, but friends. Sometimes we are surprised by an unexpected death and sometimes we find relief knowing a client-friend is no longer suffering. After a few minutes of conversation and sharing of stories, the discussion turns to handling of accounts. I usually say that we will need a death certificate and that we have all the other paperwork all ready on file.
Once we receive the death certificate, we process the paperwork, get needed signatures and follow the distribution paperwork as outlined in the trust or beneficiary forms. We usually meet with each of the beneficiaries, set up accounts if needed and get everything ready to distribute assets.
The assets can pass “in-kind” or as cash. Most of the work is simply an electronic process. In terms of an individual’s liquid assets, their entire life savings can be distributed in a matter of days. One day it was “Dad’s” money and the next day it is “your” money. Dad’s money eventually becomes untraceable over the years as it is comingled with your money. When you pass, your money will go to the kids and it will become “their” money. At that point, there usually isn’t a thought about the true origin of the money. Unless grandfather’s money is set aside in a special trust, his impact on the financial lives of his posterity will almost be imperceptible.
This is my great grandfather Cliff’s notary stamp. He was the head cashier at the local bank during the depression. I can imagine this stamp sitting on his desk at the bank. I am sure he used it hundreds of times as he notarized legal documents for people in town. No doubt he knew everyone in town by name. When the state of Michigan closed the banks to prevent a run on the banks, I can imagine him tasked with the painful job of locking the bank doors and trying to explain to his friends why they couldn’t withdraw their money. I can sense the anguish that he must have felt in having to demand payment on loans with money no one had. It got so bad, that the folks in town suspected Cliff of stealing the money and burying it on his own farm. My grandmother went to school in a different town to protect her from some of the persecution. My grandmother never was able to talk about those times besides saying it was “sad.”
Over time, the country recovered as did the bank. Cliff regularly bought shares of the bank and it ended up providing significant wealth to my family. This notary stamp is now in my possession. It is meaningful to me because I know its story. It represents courage, dogged determination, and honor. My father recently sent me this dollar with a letter tracing this dollar to my great grandfather. I know a little of the sacrifice and the stewardship that took to make and preserve this dollar. While my dad gave me this dollar and it is now in my possession, it will always be Cliff’s. Just as it is my responsibility to take care of this notary stamp and pass it along to the next generation, I have the same responsibility to steward this dollar bill. Neither the cash nor this heirloom is mine. I will use it wisely.
Did you notice the difference between how we treat financial wealth and heirlooms? Heirlooms are often transitioned from one generation to the next via the power of story. That is why they tend to remain in the family for many generations—because everyone knows that this is Cliff’s stamp. Financial assets are distributed to the next generation via some legal document. Since there is no story attached. No stewardship is fostered. No legacy is created. Most inheritances evaporate by the third generation.
Our mission is to help your family identify and share your family legacy story and your family wealth story with the goal of fostering intergenerational stewardships to ultimately strengthen family unity.
So give us a call, tell us what you are trying to accomplish. We’d love to help.
